Merry Christmukkuh!

So this month I've been pretty MIA from the blogworld. And that's primarily because there's simply too much to do before Christmukkuh!! I've been running around like a chicken with her head cut off all month and here we are: 2 days before Santa's going to shimmey down my non-existent chimney and leave me some special much-needed gifts. Now don't get me wrong, I've been celebrating all month with holiday party after holiday party. And believe it or not, I've got a lot more even after the big day. This past weekend I attended 2 tacky sweater partys, and Sunday I hosted a cocktail/dinner party for some of my close friends.

Now I can have RyRey all to myself

I'm sure most of you heard all about the Ryan Reynolds/Scarlett Johannsson breakup by now. Oh, and what perfect timing! When I already can't get enough of the beautiful man by repeatedly watching Just Friends over and over - now I can bask in the wonderfulness that is the fact that this year's Sexiest Man Alive is single again! AND shooting a movie in Atlanta. I mean damn. I seriously would LOVE to meet him slash marry him. He's beautiful and sexy and has perfect bone structure. Not to mention a body that makes my toes curl. And who can forget his sense of humor! OMG. New mission: scour the city of Atlanta to meet him and make him fall madly in love with me. I mean hey, if I can meet Ian Somerhalder and Paul Wesley at the Clermont Lounge, surely I can find Ryan Reynolds. I just have to be at the right place at the right time.

If you need me, I'll be searching for the love of my life. In the meantime, here's some enjoyable eye candy:

There's always a "but".

So...you know how I said I got off match? Well...I lied. I mean, I really haven't logged on in probably over a month, but I just did today because I actually got a message from someone that was more than just "hey u look hott. want 2 chat?"

Of course, upon further review, I'm not all that interested, but I did have my "daily 5" to check out, so I read through the profiles and actually stumbled upon 2 interesting men. Everything they said in their profiles sounded great! They seem very mature - looking for something more than just a friendship or a hook up, they like all sorts of different activities - things I've wanted to try and things that scare me to death but could be exciting to try one day. A sense of humor (I can tell in their writing), good looks, kind smiles. So, what's his "but", right? There's always a but.

Here's Why I'm Just Not That Into You...

I don't know about anyone else, but I cannot WAIT to see Love & Other Drugs. I just might go watch it tomorrow night after work. Even if it's by myself. Yes, I know, this movie has been out since Thanksgiving and, where have I been, right? Well, if you've noticed, I haven't exactly posted anything since before Thanksgiving, much less have I had time to go to the movies. But I just read an interesting post from Jewels  which reminded me that I have yet to see this movie. So there. My cousin, Sara told me that it was awesome - but probably not the best movie to watch with your mother (which she did) unless you have a very open communication style and trade sex tips. If you know me AT ALL, you know that's not the kind of relationship I have with my mom. But I want to see it nonetheless.

Tur-Tur-Key-Key Day

Ah, Thanksgiving. My favorite holiday of the year, followed by my favorite non-holiday, day of the year, Black Friday. You all remember the things I love about Thanksgiving, right? Well this year, I'm super excited as always, to celebrate another year of delicious food and the tryptophan hangover. But fortunately or unfortunately, this will be a somewhat untradtional Thankgiving for me there. Let's review the good and the bad things about this year, shall we?

Crazy Little Thing Called Love

Well, I'll be damned if I ever figure this out. The games we play and the crazy hoops we jump through for the guy or girl that we think we're crazy about are beyond me. I find it funny that when we're not looking for love it falls in our laps and when we actively seek it out, it's one dead end after another. Why is that? And why is it that some women manage to NEVER be single, and some women can't do anything to get out of their dry spells (unless they resort to prostitution...which isn't an option for any of us with a moral fiber in our bodies)? These questions go through many of our minds on a weekly basis. And I think part of it is society's pressure - our parents were married at 22 (or younger in some cases) and here we are at 25...why don't we have husbands yet? Hey-zeus Christo, mom, get out of my head!

The Friend Zone Part 2

Well, here we go again with The Friend Zone. You'll remember in my last post, I talked about The Nice Guy and how to move out of the Friend Zone if you find yourself in such a situation with a girl you've fallen for. But today, I'm actually going to hit on something different. Last week I stumbled upon a new site called Dudeships and found it to be quite interesting. Written by a few guys, this particular blog is adamant about the fact that guys and girls CANNOT be friends - as clearly displayed in the classic When Harry Met Sally movie back in the 80s. And to some degree, I can agree with it. Instead of being "friends" with the opposite sex, these bloggers believe there's such a thing called a "dudeship" in which they define different levels of relationships with women who are not their girlfriends.

I know I can be long-winded at times but....

If you're a regular reader, you know that I have a tendancy to ramble at times. I'm sorry. I can't help it. Sometimes I just can't seem to put my thoughts into the most simplistic and concise sentences. Yet you dear readers still humor me, read the whole thing and hopefully by the end still feel compelled to comment and for that, I thank you. So, in the spirit of all of this thankfulness and appreciation, I'm going to cut right to the chase for this post. Over the weekend, around 11:30 or so Saturday night, I received the LONGEST match email I've ever received. Ever. And I simply HAVE to share it with you guys. Enjoy!
_______________________________________________________________________

match say we''re compatible i tend to agree, you?

"Bros" vs "My girls"

So my week's kind of been shot to hell thanks to Aaron Karo. Seriously, I don't know how I've never heard of him ONCE over the last 13 years. This baffles my mind. Because I'm usually pretty savvy when it comes to what's hot on the interwebs. I mean, hello 2003 Ebaumsworld and Collegehumor.com. Who could forget the initial viral videos that hit the internet - beginning with the Ally McBeal dancing baby (probably in 1997), to the Aisha video and The End of the World animation in 2003, Bubb Rubb & Lil Sis, to the more recent Bed Intruder Song (Hide ya kids, hide ya wife), and every other thing that's gone viral over the last decade? They're all classics. Everyone shares them. And yet somehow, on my collegehumor.com visits, the best-designed beer pong tables took precedent over the amazing Aaron Karo. WHY?!?!

Ok, the important thing is, I've found him now. And I've been getting a lot LESS work done this week as a result. Today I read a great Rumination entitled "Boys" (Rumination #86 to be precise) and Karo makes an interesting point that I want to expand upon. Here's the following entry from Karo:

Roses are Red

Morning fellow hot messes!

So I've recently been following My So-Called Online Dating Life (if you follow my other bloggers to the right, I'm sure you've noticed) and this single 30-something brought up the long-distance e-dating predicament. Ugh. As if online dating isn't hard enough - you want to throw 2000 miles between you as well? NOT my idea of a fun time. You'll remember a while back when I had some Romeo from Illinois contact me about a band that he was trying to promote and his girlfriend had just left him for someone on facebook, right? Well, as I was commenting on My So-Called Online Dating Life this morning, I received another interesting email from a potential online suitor. It's short and sweet, and by sweet I mean, weird and creepy. Here goes!

HST: The World is the Best!

Any avid follower of my blog knows that I'm a HUGE sketch comedy fan, and an even bigger Harvard Sailing Team fan. Welp, they've just released a new video on Youtube and this time, they've taken a little bit of a different approach to their normal routine. The've created: a SONG!

I'm in love with this already - mainly because it kind of reminds me of "We are the World", "What's Goin On" remake, and all those other songs for a cause that have been performed at various music awards shows over the past 15 years by about 25+ artists each singing one line and then coming together in a chorus.

Newest Obsession

So...I don't know why I'm just now stumbling onto this...because apparently it's been around for 13 years and I'm like WAY behind but, whatevs. I've found it, I love it, and I'm not letting it go. Aaron Karo: Ruminations. This guy is genius! I ruminate ALL the effing time!!!!!!!! And the funny thing about this guy is that he essentially ruminates like status updates. Some are a little more detailed than others, and wouldn't qualify for the 140 character twitter updates, but they'd fit for FB. But not like status updates that you and I would write - more like Taco (from The League) updates. Some of it is pretty random but everything he talks about is something that when you think about it you're like "huh, that's so right!" Maybe that's why Ruminations are defined as "Writing what you're thinking". Anyway, if you haven't checked out Ruminations, I suggest you do. It's genius, I tell you. Pure genius!

Shut up and PAY ATTENTION!

What are YOU doing this coming December? Yes, all of December. Ok, I'll give you the few days around Xmas and NYE off because I guess *family* is important. And as for God's chosen people, you can take your Chaunaka (I still don't know how to spell that) but keep SOME time in December open. Especially if you're single. And especially if you're a lady. *Why?* you ask. Because Berryfine and I have stumbled upon something spectacular. Jess and Becky of WTFisupwithmylovelife are coming to ATLANTA in December!!! And they want to interview YOU and ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That is of course, if you're cultivating a Gaggle.

Happy Hump Day Indeed: "I'm Fantastic in Bed"

A friend of mine passed this along to me and I simply had to share - it's so hilarious and totally hits on the true definition of Marketing. Enjoy!

You're a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, "I'm fantastic in bed." That's direct marketing…

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One of your friends goes up to him and says, "She's fantastic in bed." That's advertising…

Back in the saddle...

Well, not quite "the saddle" per se. But yes...I'm going on another "blind" date tonight. Since Chandler pulled the slow fade and I've heard nothing but radio silence for 2 weeks now, I've decided that I'm ready for a new dating prospect. I've purged myself of Chandler and my wishful thinking that his phone just died or some other lame excuse - he is no more and I'm over it.

So instead, I'm going to meet Will tonight. I really don't know much about him yet except that he's a band teacher and has a passion for music (Will Shuster anyone? Glee? I know Glee Club isn't the same as band but level with me here). Now I never took band in high school or anything but I do have a passion for music. I'm just hoping he doesn't reek of band-geekiness.

Oof, where have I been...?

I can't believe it's been a week since I posted. My b. All 6 of my followers are probably outraged that I've been MIA...so where have I been? I'll tell you. I've been workin. Like a Doge-uh. (can anyone else take a shot at spelling that phrase the way Paul Rudd actually says it in I Love You, Man? Didn't think so so stop judging me.)

Last week shit got super crazy at work. Like, crazier than it's been in a LONG time. I worked til 7pm 3 nights last week and that's just unheard of. Not that I'm complaining or anything - it's great to be busy, but holy hell. I've just been go-go-go. And then of course Friday, I got to see 2 of my favorite things in the world come together:

The Friend Zone Part 1

Everyone knows the Nice Guy, right? That guy who seems to always be the one you can call on after your boyfriend dumps you. The one who will pick up your bar tab even though there's not a shot in hell that you'd go home with him. The guy who you can totally be your worst self around and he'll still adore you. He's just so nice. He compliments you and might even shower you with gifts on your birthday. He treats your friends nicely. He's just...Nice. And in the words of Ryan Reynolds, if you're the Nice Guy, you've just become the "non-sexual entity to her and she'll never see you as more than a friend."

Serial Killers vs Fairy Tales

Well, I really thought I'd developed a good read on this one. But apparently I was wrong. Pretty sure Chandler is a serial killer. You remember my theories on serial killers, right? And maybe I'm just telling myself he's a serial killer to help me sleep better at night. (Wait, does that even make sense...? actually it does) Surely it isn't anything I've done that would be the reason he hasn't called/texted/emailed me in a week, right??? He's just emotionally and physically incapable of continuing to pursue me because he realizes just how much he likes me and how perfect I am for him, therefore, he must "systematically and methodically kill every real opportunity at a relationship".

West Coast Woes

It feels like deja vu all over again. Most of you will remember back in May when the most devastating of all devastations hit me: my biffle moved to Los Angeles. It was a sad day that literally made me cry when I met her at the airport to say goodbye. Sophia was off to sunny california to pursue the fashion world by attending FIDM, landing a killer internship and working for Michael Kors in the process. All whilst gallivanting with beautiful celebrities in a little place I like to call Paradise. Sophia would be the seventh of my close close friends who moved away from Hot-lanta in the last year. I'm starting to think that I either suck as a friend or I smell really bad. J-baz moved to the beach in Charleston, Coffaro headed back home to Cincy, Patty took off for Saint Diaaaago. Megs moved to Oregon for grad school and her boyfriend, Catherine hit the Big Apple and Wendy moved to Missouri. And now, my best friend in the whole world, Erin is moving to San Fran.

Ask the Office Guy

Do any of you subscribe to Daily Candy? I'm not even sure how I got subscribed to it but I get emails pretty much every day from them. Most of the time, I don't really read through them but today's email caught my eye. It was titled: "10 Writers we'd like to cozy up with". I've really been on a reading kick recently and there are tons of books that are on my list that I haven't gotten around to yet. So I actually took the time to read the email today. But that's not really the point of this post. Down at the bottom of the email there was this link to an article that said "How long do I wait to facebook him?". In today's age, everyone facebooks each other the day after they meet, sometimes within the hour that they meet even - yes, we are an extremely narcissistic generation who believes our self-worth is proclaimed through the number of facebook friends we have. That's just how we work. And we also secretly want to facebook stalk the cutie we just met as soon as we can get to a secluded area with dim lighting.

Facial Hair, Good or Bad?

In honor of this past weekends Georgia victory (41-14, whatup!) and the 2nd annual Stache Out weekend that carried on alongside it, I got to thinking about facial hair on a man, and what I like and dislike about it. There's something extremely creepy and child-molestor-esque about a moustache. But I can definitely support it for a day if it's synonymous with Georgia winning against Tennessee (or any other SEC team for that matter). But any other time, I'm not really a fan of the moustache. There are only a select few men who can pull off Just the Stache.

Who would YOU go gay for?

Last night I went to B-dubs to watch some football and to watch the Braves get their ass handed to them on a silver platter. And somewhere around beer number 4, someone brought up hot celebrities and...well it's all a bit fuzzy from there. We began discussing who we would go gay for and the first person named was Angelina Jolie. And I don't know if it was the number of beers I'd already consumed or the fact that she just pisses me off in general (JAnniston, I've always got your back), but I made a sour face and said "gross".

The Game: To play or not to play?

So I don't want to put all my eggs in one basket and I don't want to jinx myself like I talked about last week but I'm beginning to feel more and more like my new-found love-interest is taking on a larger role in my life than I expected him to at this point. And it's hard to transition. You know, you go from like single-ready-to-mingle, I-live-only-for-myself-and-don't-have-to-answer-to-anyone - to all of a sudden being like i-should-invite-him-to-my-non-profit-event-in-3-weeks-just-to-get-it-on-his-calendar-holy-shit-what-am-i-saying-that's-three-weeks-away! It's quite unnerving.

My love life is like a box of chocolates

Tis true. You really never know what you're gonna get.

Thank you Forrest Gump. Wise words my friend. Wise words.

For those of you who've been keeping up with my e-dating disasters, you may be wondering why I haven't touched on this subject in almost a month. Welp, you've been patient long enough and I suppose it's about time that I fill you in on my newest dating endeavor.

What do Joe & Blake have in common?

They're both names of exes and both great gay bars. A little ironic, huh? Actually, Blake's not the name of one of MY exes but...whatevs. It works. And if you don't like it, I don't really care.

So yesterday I suffered through one of the longest days of work of my life and didn't get a chance to share the awesome tales of debauchery (part 2) with Stuart.

Monday night, after working off a hangover most of the day, I finally recovered and got my act together in the afternoon - excited to make plans with Stuart, my GBF. He wanted to go to Joe's on Juniper (excuse me, for the gays in the know, it's just Joe's - as Stuart's boyfriend so poignantly pointed out to me).

I want an unsliceably soft roll right now

Sooo my GBF is in town this week and I could not be more stoked! Stuart is seriously one of my absolute favorite people in the world! And he's beyond fabulous! I seriously haven't seen the boy in 3 years and he got into town yesterday afternoon. He brought his boyfriend and 2 of his friends that work with him in Orlando - yes, he's the stereotypical, musical theatre, struggling actor/singer/dancer/choreographer, gay man that you would expect. He's everything you want in a GBF and more. I made him spoon with me last night since apparently I haven't had a man's touch in a while - and I'm totally ok with the fact that I did not turn him on in the slightest bit last night. I simply love cuddling and spooning so last night was fabulous. But I did pull the whole "ugh, i'm hot now, can you move over?" bit after about 30 minutes. I cannot sleep when I'm hot.

Like Daughter, Like Mother?

So I'm finally back from vacation, and I'm somewhat caught up from being out for a week so I figure it's time to dust off the ole keyboard and start blogging again.

Vacay was awesome. Minus the whole, hanging-out-with-your-parents-for-6-days-straight deal. Don't get me wrong, I love my parents but 6 days non-stop is a little extreme for anyone. And I know that one day when I'm 45 and have kids of my own, that they'll feel the same way about me as I do about my parents. And I'm ok with that. My point remains, 6 days is a LONG time.

To be honest though, I always thought that once I became an adult, that I would grow out of that mentality that my parents are simply uncool.

Vegas Adventures

How lucky am I that I get to visit Vegas twice in one year!?!?!? The first time was on the company dime and this time, Mom & Pops will be funding my gambling and drinking habits. Needless to say I'm pretty stoked. I love the Vegas and I can't wait to play a little roulette, a little black-jack, perhaps some craps & hit those slot machines. How crazy awesome would it be to win a little moolah in a couple of days! Yes and please.

It's a nice day for a white-trash wedding

I know I know...
1) It's been a hot-minute since I last posted; and
2) My last topic was on weddings - dub-tee-fuck? what gives?

Well, first let me address the former. Last week was officially my week from hell. Satan came to visit and decided to knock me on my ass and keep a pitch-fork to my neck a-la-Jessica Simpson/Dukes of Hazzard/Direct TV commercial circa 2006 style, and didn't let me breathe til yesterday. It wasn't so bad after I blacked out. Everything kind of went numb for a while as I had an out-of-body experience, watching myself run around Johns Creek like a chicken with my head cut off from Thursday to Sunday. It was a rather humorous experience. And when I finally came to, I found myself waking up from a dream that I was throwing up everywhere, when, in actuality, I was just coughing up a lung. Thanks Satan. Come visit again soon please!

Wedding Blunder

Weddings can be wonderful, right? Everyone's dressed to impress, you catch yourself checking out that hot groomsman or usher who not only walked you down the aisle and winked at you when you found your seat, but he also was so careful as he helped the 96 year old grandmother of the bride down the aisle as well - you just know that he knows how to treat a lady. You find yourself batting your eyelashes and daintily smiling in his direction while the preacher reads the nuptuals, and you can't wait for the reception to begin so he can ask you to dance. The bride & groom say I do and you jet over to the reception and start hitting the wine bar. You'd like to relax a little before that hottie in the tux decides to come over and talk to you.

Oops I missed 100

So yesterday was my 100th published blog-post and I completely didn't even realize it. Oops. I guess it's not that big of a deal but it's kind of cool. Been blogging since last November - I can't believe it's been that long! Well, congratulations to me for hitting 101 posts. I wish it had been more monumental. I wish I'd had something hilarious to share with everyone to commemorate this amazing occasion. Oh well. It's Friday. And I have lots to do before I skidaddle outta here into my fun-filled weekend. Happy Friday!

Hope my Lay-dar is working this weekend

Welp, it's official. Almost. I have 2 dates this weekend. Hanging with Adam on Friday and just firming up details like where & when with Cameron for Saturday. Yikes! 2 dates in 2 days? And slap a wedding on the end of that and who knows, I might meet a potential 3rd date by the end of the weekend! I really need to give props to the girls over at WTF is up with my Love Life because they definitely got it right when they put a name to what most single ladies consider their dating life balancing act (the Gaggle). You might remember me referencing Jess & Becky back in June and their belief that we live in a post-dating world. Well they're also the inventors of the Gaggle. Yes, the gaggle is that group of guys that you constantly have circling your love life. You're not in full-fledged relationships with any of them because - hello slut - but they're all guys that you've entertained the idea of dating/sleeping with to some degree. And there are 10 different types of guys who make up this Gaggle:

E-dating = Overwhelming

I feel like all anyone is talking about anymore is e-dating. 2 months ago, it wasn't anywhere NEAR my radar and now, it's everywhere. For example, I've found it with the good, the "interesting", the bad, and the fugly.

And I'm sure that I'm subconsciously stumbling upon these articles and websites because I'm part of that world right now, but it really seems odd that everywhere I turn, there they are. Something else I've realized recently is that online dating is all about how much of yourself you want to put into it - that's how much you'll get out of it. I find myself getting wrapped up into the emails and the winks when I've found a guy who suits my interests and is a good conversationalist. But when there's a week of lull from their end, there's a lack of effort and time spent on the site on my end. This week has been slightly overwhelming.

At it again

So last week I decided that I was going to run another half marathon and I signed up for the Thanksgiving Day Half through the Atlanta Track Club. I probably should have touched on this last week but with the blog make-over and the dates I just had too many other things on my mind, but it didn't stop me from signing up for the low price of $48.48! So yeah, I've started running again (twice this week!). And you better believe I'm going at this with full force. Deep down, I really am a runner - and I love it! But dammit if my knee won't NOT cause me problems again. Seriously, it hurts to walk down stairs because when I step down with my right leg, my left knee bends kind of back and pain shoots up my left leg. It's not fun. Yesterday during my 3 mile run I could tell that it was giving me problems but I powered on because I really wanted to hit that 3 mile mark. I was wearing my jumpers knee strap but as soon as I slowed it down for my "cool down" my knee was in more pain than when I was running. Why oh why did I have to jack up my ankle last year and ultimately weaken my knee in the process!?

Pleased to Announce, Ted Bundy is no Longer a Threat at this Time

Wouldn't you know that as soon as I begin to write someone off...they surprise me. I thought Adam might have been a serial killer, but apparently that's not the case. Yep...I have another date lined up with him. That's right...a SECOND date with the same guy. This looks somewhat promising. But I absolutely am NOT getting my hopes up just yet. See in this post-dating world we live in, right around the 3rd or 4th date is when I usually lose their interest or I lose interest in them. I guess because I've been out with them enough to realize that this is not someone I can see myself with long term and vice-versa. Which is simply part of the dating world and something I've come to accept. But in the past, these "dates" I speak of, were more like group hangs and meeting at bars with friends. There was a certain "comfort level" established by parties we already knew so that if we decided we weren't that fond of one another, we could play it off casually, or if we did hit it off, we could peel off from the group. 

I Think I Went Out With a Serial Killer

Quite possibly. It's still a little too early to tell, but Adam might be a serial killer. I'm sure you're wondering what led me to this conclusion. Last week I talked to you about how I had 3 different dates, with 3 different guys, and Adam seemed like the only normie of the group, right? Well I still think that might be the case but it might also mean that he's a serial killer.

Maybe I should back up. A serial killer, when related to online dating, means a few different things to me:

True Life: I'm a PC

Ok, it's time that I be 100% honest about something...in case you haven't already guessed from the work of art that IS my blog header...I'm a PC. There, I said it. Wow, that feels like such a relief to get it out there! I don't have to hide anymore! Whew!

Yes I'm well aware that owning a PC automatically makes me lame to Mac users, and truthfully I whole-heartedly agree with you in most all cases. PC's were BUILT for programs like excel and access and word and power point. Macs were built for fun that just so happens to also coincide with hard work (primarily for designers of all kinds and "creative types"). I know that macs are so much cooler than PCs, but the truth is...I've operated on a PC for as long as I can remember, and thanks to my financial growing pains, I will remain a PC user until further notice. That being said...I am pretty damn proud of my finger-painting masterpiece at the top of the page.

3rd time's a charm

Welp, last night was date number 3 and in my book...it was a success! My third date, who shall here-forth be known as Adam, is adorable and definitely fits the Andy Samberg/Adam Brody look in person, just as he does in his picture. Aside from the fact that we were sweating like whores in church during dinner (thanks to Atlanta's lovely 95% humidity streak and the grand idea to sit outside on the patio), the date was a lot of fun and he actually seemed NORMAL to me! I didn't have to fake a courtesy laugh, he legitimately humored me. And after dinner, the stand-up comedian was pretty entertaining and had me rolling at the end when he started talking about sex jokes.

Excess Baggage

So here we go - out with the old and in with the hotmess-ness. I've officially taken over this new URL so everyone take note! http://www.blondehotmess.blogspot.com/. It seems to be a little more fitting than Always Sunny...because to be honest, we all know my life is a hot mess most of the time. And I plan to record my fun hot-mess-nightmares for all you lovely readers to enjoy at my expense.

In other news: today I received the following message from match:

And then there was One

So, as I mentioned the other day, I have acquired 3 dates so far from online dating - not bad for being a member for less than 3 weeks, right? And that's after sifting through some of the shadier emails and propositions I've received. But those are for another post, another day. Yep, I've found 3 eligible men who I've at least entertained the idea of meeting and going on a date with. And so far, I've followed through on two of the three. The third is tonight. And I have to say that while the experience has been an interesting one thus far, it hasn't been exactly what I expected it to be. The commercials make everyone look so happy! You see the pretty woman meet the handsome man and shake hands, both with huge smiles on their faces. You just know they instantly click! And then the shot cuts to them, present-day, with arms wrapped around each other, smiling and talking about how they've truly found the love of their lives. Welp, I'm here to let you in on a little secret: That's not how it works.

Blog Explanation?

Ok, I should probably provide an explanation on why my blog design is changing (yet again!) I started this blog last November and one might say that I've changed quite a bit over the last 9 months. No baby-daddy/pregnancy scares, just changed, personality-wise. I took on blogging originally as a creative outlet to get my thoughts out, maybe share a few laughs, make others feel better by my ridiculous antics and embarrassing stories and really just try my hand at writing. And so far, it's done all of those things for me, and more! But over the last nine months, I've turned 25, come to realize that the dating scene is a mess, gotten more joy out of writing than my actual job and unfortunately lost a number of friends to jobs/schools that are much further than an arm's length away.

Watch This! Wednesday - Bed Intruder Song

So by now a lot of you may have already seen this but since I've been MIA for a couple of weeks for WTW, thought I'd share it with anyone who HASN'T seen it yet. I was going to make some long convoluted connection between e-dating and rapists but for several reasons I don't think it's appropriate.
1) While I've been on 2 dates thus far, neither have resulted in so much as an uncomfortable sideways glance, much less made me feel violated in any way/shape/form.

E-Dating continued...

Ok - so last time I blogged I was just getting ready to try out the jungle of the online dating world. See what it's like first-hand. Because there's all this talk about "is there a stigma" when it comes to online dating? And what better way to find out than to experience it yourself. And what have I discovered over the last few weeks? Well...a LOT. When I was setting up my eharmony profile (which took over an hour), I sort of live-blogged. You see, I'm still somewhat of a skeptic when it comes to online dating because how well can these sites really match you up with the right person? So below, I'll share with you some of the thoughts that ran through my head when I was signing up for the free trial:

"1 out of 5 relationships...

...begins online" according to Match.com. Really? Wow. I don't know if that's impressive or depressing.



Everyone says there's no stigma attached to online dating anymore, but doesn't that mean there still IS a stigma? Because the people who say there's no stigma are the ones who ARE dating online, right? And the ones that aren't dating online believe there IS a stigma. So I guess, who really knows, right?

WTW: Boys will be Girls Part TWO

Hey guys,

Sorry i've been so MIA for the last week. I celebrated my birthday from Wednesday through the wee hours of the morning on Sunday and woke up feeling deathly ill on Sunday. Haven't been at work for 2 days and am finally back in the office. I know you've missed me dearly and I've thought of many ways to make it up to you for the remainder of the week, including sexual favors, baking cookies and lying on my couch in my underwear watching The Hills marathon now that the series is over for GOOD. (the last one I may or may not have done all day yesterday).

Anyone who reads this blog regularly knows that I am a HUGE Harvard Sailing Team fan. And if you think I'm talking about the actual sailing team at the university then you clearly don't read my blog.

I wish that I could be a California Girl...

Ah yes, the return from the beautiful city of Los Angeles. And now I'm back in the too-hot-too-humid city of Atlanta. I came to a realization a few weeks ago that a LOT of my closest friends have moved away. Soph is in LA, Meggie is in Oregon, Serena's in Charlotte, Catharine is in New York, J-baz is in Charleston, Carly is in Chicago and MK is in San Diego. And I'd almost take it personally if they didn't each have legit reasons for wanting to move to the places they've moved to. Whether it's for school, a new job, a non-profit, or to be closer to family, every single one of them has valid reasons for wanting to high-tail it out of Georgia and be at least 5 hours away from me. And yes, it's extremely narcissistic of me to make their change of geography all about me but I guess when birthdays roll around it makes me feel extremely lonely. And I kind of take it personally even though I know it's not their intent and I know I shouldn't. But yeah, the big 2-5 this year. ugh. It makes my neck hurt - must be growing pains, right?

Watch This! Wednesday - Return from Vacay

Thank you Beach Boys. I just got back from a FABULOUS trip to the west coast and I absolutely, with every fiber of my being, did NOT want to return home. First of all, my bestie Sophia lives out there. I had absolutely the best time ever! Got to do some shopping on Rodeo Drive, saw the Walk of Fame, ate at pinkberry, went to Santa Monica, went to Laguna Beach and saw where Kristen and Steven used to have all their "special talks", saw the NY Smiths (who were HILARIOUS) and lots more. I bought a new purse and some new clothes (LA's H&M's are so much better than Atlantas!) and am officially broke as a joke. But it was worth it. Sooooo worth it.

The New York Smiths

Well I think you all should know that after today I'll be a little MIA til next week. I might have time to put together a WTW tomorrow but no promises because I'm about to hit the skies and visit my bestie in LA!!!!!!!! It's 4th of July weekend this weekend and what better time to take a vacay, right? AND I'm going with Leigh and Nicole! Two fabulous and amazing friends of mine and we are going to hit the streets of LA, see the sights, meet some celebs (hopefully) and indulge in some much needed R&R. I might even get to meet The NY Smiths! The NY Smiths are Chris and Rebecca Smith from The Harvard Sailing Team.

Chivalry...is it dead? Part 2

Happy Thursday everyone. So last week was rather hellish at work so I didn't have time to post too much but I have been trying to write about this topic for over a week now so I figure I better get to it!  I have stumbled across some very interesting articles and blogs related to dating/sex/relationships recently and I think it's time I offer my 2 cents. But first - Part of what lead me to today's post is much more than just these articles and blogs. It has to do with what's going on in my own life and my friends' dating lives.

So, can I get real with you guys for a minute? (Always!) So over the last 8 years of my dating life I've definitely kissed a few frogs and have yet to find my prince.

WTW: Entourage

Happy Hump Day!

So in a few short days I'll be blessed with the Season 7 premiere of Entourage on HBO! My roommie and I have been waiting for this day for months!!!!!! So this week's WTW is dedicated to the fabulous cast of Entourage and HBO.

WTW: This one's for my Roommate

Happy Wednesday everyone!

Most of you who know me, know that I am not really a pet person. It's not that I don't like animals - but I just never grew up around animals so I am not what one would normally call a "pet person". However, many of you also know that I currently live with a cat - my roommate's cat. And she's kind of a bitch, but tolerable. She acts more like a dog than a cat in some ways - which is good in my opinion - but she also has her typical Queen Bitch attitude that most other cats have as well. Thank God she's not a long-haired cat like Sassy from Homeward Bound. Those long-haired cats seem to act more entitled than the short-haired cats. Anyway, today's Watch This! Wednesday is for my roommate - who has a cat. Sometimes Briggs can be a real pesky pain in the ass. And today's WTW is an educational video about "How to Put the Spark Back in Your Relationshp With Your Cat":

Watch This! Wednesday - Tyler Herrin!!!!

Hey guys,

So today's WTW is not your typical stupid/funny video. This week I gotta give props to my good buddy Tyler Herrin!!! You remember Tyler, right? He's recently released his new album A Simple Necessary and it's kind of the shit. And he's kind of the shit. No? Don't believe me? Well, let me show you JUST how cool Tyler is. The video below is Tyler who got called up on stage at the BARE NAKED LADIES concert last Saturday!!! He got pulled up on stage to actually PLAY! With the BAND!! And this is not just some band for Tyler, it's like his all-time, inspired-him-to-learn-the-guitar-in-the-first-place, favorite band in the world!

Everybooodddaaayy went to the concert

So I didn't really have time to update on Friday but let me just tell you...the BSB concert was absolutely phenom. Not only were our seats less than 10 feet from the stage, but Brian totally looked right at me, smiled and waved. And holy hell, like a fine wine, they seem to get better with age. Brian's son introduced them and he is just about the cutest kid ever. They sang the classics, sang some new stuff, each did a video placement and it was nothing short of magical. I went with 6 of my girlfriends and we had an absolutely amazing time. It was like middle school all over again. And you'd be surprised how many people were at the concert! I mean, Chastain was PACKED. I guess because everyone around my age is still as fond of them as they were back in 1998.

Thank God BSB is tonight, otherwise Eff My Life

So...the day has arrived...the loves of my life are returning to the stage at Chastain Amphitheatre! That's right! Backstreet's Back Alright!!!!!!!!! And thank GOD for that. This morning on my way to work, my car completely died. Like, engine went kaput. I had to deal with AAA and Hertz and didn't get to work until an hour ago. I should probably NOT be blogging right now, but working instead, BUT I simply can't NOT acknowledge that the Backstreet Boys are coming to Atlanta tonight so here we sit. I'll make this short and sweet.

Watch This! Wednesday - HST is BACK

Ok so before I get started on this week's WTW, I have to share 2birds1blog with you. You remember a couple weeks ago when I threw back to 1996? K's Choice? Not an Addict? Ringing any bells? Well, part of my morning routine when I get to work is: Start up computer. Load office email. Load Internet Explorer. Click 2b1b from my igoogle. Read today's post while eating my breakfast and drinking coffee. And today I was BLOWN AWAY! Meggles threw back to middle school and DAMN did she hit some hot songs. Check that out here AFTER you read my WTW. Or before, I don't care. But it's worth reading if you were born between 1983 and 1986.

I have to remind myself it's only 10 months

This past Saturday marked a sad and hard day in the life of Blaire McBlogger. Yep, this past Saturday I had to say goodbye to a dear friend of mine, Sophia. She's headed for bigger and brighter things than this lowly city of Atlanta has to offer her. She's off to discover the west coast, and fashion school, and rub elbows with the likes of LC and Heidi, among others. And you better believe she will be missed. School starts in a little over a month for Soph, and I can wish her nothing but the best while she's over there in Sunny Cali. But damn am I going to miss her. I know I've mentioned Sophia in my posts before, but I don't think I've ever really given you the background on how we became such good friends. So please, allow me:

Ladies & Gentlemen: Wesley Cook!!!!!!

So some of you may remember a couple months back when I blogged about my good friend Tyler Herrin - aspiring musician who's trying to make it in the big bad city of Atlanta. Welp, it's time to plug another musician friend of mine: Wesley Cook.

WTW: Man in the Box

Happy Hump Day!

I don't know about you kids but I am exhausted today. Sophia and I went to Shout for Round 2 of the Drag Show last night and I had a RULL rough time getting out of bed this morning. Not from drinking but just from lack of sleep. I hate that I have to be at the office by a certain time every day. I totes wish I could make my own hours (but we all know that would result in me sleeping til noon every day and not being productive in the slightest), but c'est la vie!

Sober-Up-Monday is the Red-Headed Step-Child of the Week

Well I don't know about you guys but Sunday Funday might be my favorite day of the week. Especially when it starts to get nice outside. I know everyone loves a good ole fashioned Friday Happy Hour, followed by an undoubtedly epic Saturday at the Clerb or pub of your choice...and typically people operate under the mentality that Saturday is the Go Hard or Go Home evening...because Sunday is the day of rest - The Lord's day, if you will, and the day to get your shit together before facing the God-awful Monday morning, right? Well if you talk to me or MY friends, you'd be sadly mistaken. No no. We operate that SUNDAY is the Go Hard or Go Home day. Why? Well for one, life is better with a buzz.

Watch This! Wednesday - I want Stardust Entertainment to be my Wedding DJ

Happy Hump Day!

Today's WTW is pretty effing hilarious in my opinion. First off, who loves Phil Collins? I do! I do! Well, I mainly just like In the Air Tonight - but I mean who doesnt? Hello Risky Business! Hello The Hangover! Hello Gorillas (last year Erin shared a fabulous little video that involves a Gorilla and Phil Collins) If you can appreciate any of the three Phil Collins videos I just linked to then you'll appreciate what I'm about to show you...

Holy 1996

So I don't normally blog twice in one day but I just HAD to mention this this afternoon because if I don't then I'll forget about it by tomorrow's post - which sucks - and also it will have nothing to do with WTW so it wouldn't be fitting. Not to mention I'm not working Thurs which means I definitely won't be blogging then(because it's what i do to pass the time, jk, but not really, or am i?) and by the time friday rolls around i REALLY will have forgotten.

So I was jammin out in my car on the way back from lunch and switched the station to 99x. My all-time favorite radio station evs! 99x was probably the first REAL radio station I listened to once I finally started appreciating music of my generation.

Holy 2003...

So I was perusing my facebook photos today when I stumbled upon the FIRST ever photo of me that was posted on facebook. It was a picture of Erin and Victoria and I, 2 weeks after graduating high school, while we were on a trip in Germany, making some weird hand signal that I'm sure carried some significant meaning at the time. And I look like I weigh maybe 95 lbs. Now, i'm not saying that that's healthy, but i'm also not not saying that's healthy.

Zack Morris Time OUT!!!! That trip to Germany was the most effed up trip of our lives. Still, to this day, I wonder if it was all a dream because I can't quite wrap my head around the fact that anything that happened on that trip, actually happened. The only reason that I think I know it happened is because there were other people (besides Erin and Victoria and I) who were there.

Doom's Day is rapidly approaching

So most of you know that I am a 24-year-old, Atlanta native. Yep, 24. Which means the big 2-5 is rapidly approaching. And I'm not happy about it one bit. 25! That sounds so old! I guess that when I was younger, I thought that by the time I turned 25 I'd have my life figured out. And that is FAR from the case. I'll be 25 in less than 2 months and aside from having a steady job, I pretty much have NOTHING else figured out. And the steady job is really just exactly that. It's not necessarily what I want to settle into and do for the rest of my life (i'm still figuring that out) but it's a time-killer and a money-maker for the time being. Keeps food on the table and a roof over my head...and allows me to lead an extravagant lifestyle fork over the rest to the state, much to my chagrin.

Watch This! Wednesday - is SORR about the bag

I have to go on a hiatus -- A very short hiatus but a hiatus, nonetheless. Sorr about the bag kids but I don't have time to humor you today :(

Wish that wasn't the case but between the hour long call I just had with my mother AT work, the minor personal freak-out I suffered this morning with Maggie AND Sophia, and the mounds of paperwork that are piling up on my desk as we speak, I simply don't have the time or energy today to get you all hot and bothered and and excited by spitting out some witty post for you and finishing you off with a viral video (yes that's meant to sound sexual...but that's as much foreplay as you're getting from me today). It's not that I don't care about all 8 of you who read my blog -- BELIEVE me I do! But sometimes, things happen in this world that are out of my control and you have the universe to blame for my lack of WTW today. So...hopefully I will have time for a tardy WTW (or a DubTeeDub, if you will) tomorrow!

Chivalry...is it dead?

So the other day I was chit chatting with some of my girlfriends and we were discussing our thoughts about whether chivalry was dead or not. I mean, you watch old romantic movies and you see the man who pursues the woman of his dreams and does everything right to court her and they fall in love and live happily ever after, right? Hmmm...and how many of us, today, can say that they've been courted like that (or even courted at all)? And maybe it's old fashioned and maybe this is very naive of me to say but I feel like chivalry is something that will never go out of style. Every woman LOVES to be courted. And every woman wants to be treated with respect and courtesy. We all want the man that we love to do those sweet things like open our doors, bring us flowers (not for aplogizing for effing up but for no reason other than the fact that he was thinking of us) and following through on plans he's made with us. And honestly I don't think that's a lot to ask of a guy. We want someone who will be reliable and a gentleman. Someone who calls us and asks us out on dates with at least a day's advance notice.

Watch This! Wednesday - CINCO DE MAYO EDITION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok maybe I got a little carried away with the exclamation points...my apologies...but really I don't care because today is one of my favorite American Holidays, Cinco de Mayo!!!!!!!!!! Yep, it's right up there behind Thanksgiving and Black Friday, and My Birthday, and St. Patty's and Fourth of July. Cinco (that's spanish for 5 for all you unedjumacated folks out there) de Mayo falls into 6th place on my list (#fail).

However, it is Sophia's 2nd favorite holiday and for that, I must acknowledge the holiday and embrace the margaritas. Yes and Please! So I was doing a little searching for your WTW this morning -- because let's face it...I am a slacker and definitely waited til the last minute to find something -- and I decided that I wanted the WTW to fit with today's holiday and not just be some LOLZ-Hilarious-Idk-where-this-came-from video.

Watch This! Wednesday - Ostrich!

Ok, so today's WTW is not exactly what I had planned. And I hate that I'm recycling a video from another blogger (thank you 2b1b) BUT, this might be one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Like ever. And I know I continuously say this but seriously I have the maturity of a 12 year old most of the time so if you understand that about me, you can understand why this week's Watch This! Wednesday is so funny to me. But do me a HUGE favor before you hit play and just turn your volume up. The weeping screams of a child just MAKE this video.

Reunited and it feels so good!

So as many of you know, I graced the town of G-vegas with my presence this past weekend and got to catch up with some of my besties! Words cannot express how legendary this weekend was. To sum it up...in a picture:

What you are looking at here is a Tiger in Your Tank, sandwiched between a strawberry margarita and jager dispenser.

Watch This! Wednesday - TRUST FALL!

Happy hump day!!

Hope you all are having a glorious Wednesday like I am. Why is this Wednesday so glorious? Oh idk, probably because it's gorgeous outside, I have 2 days before I'm g-vegas bound and because it's WATCH THIS! Wednesday! Whatup!

Today's WTW is dedicated to a near and dear friend of mine, Daniel Tosh. Right, I WISH I was friends with that guy. If you all are not familiar with Daniel Tosh, he has a show on Comedy Central called Tosh.0, which is kind of like a funnier version of The Soup w/ Joel McHale, only it's for all things viral-video related as opposed to television. Today's video is kind of awesome, and I'll tell you why.

Drunk? Or a Kid?

So as many of you know, How I Met Your Mother is one of my favorite shows on TV right now, and I caught last night's episode online and that is the source of inspiration for today's post. Marshall (Jason Siegal) tries to make Ted feel good about a house he just purchased that is apparently failing the housing inspection miserably. So in an effort to keep everyone from beating up on Ted, he deflects their attention by saying "you know we've all done some dumb stuff in our time, but don't beat up on Ted, at least he didnt (insert story about driving the wrong way on the interstate here)." And that inspired a game called Drunk? Or a Kid? Which may or may not be one of the best games ever invented. And you better believe that I fully intend to pull this one out at the next party I go to and turn it into a drinking game. Marshall would tell these stories and everyone would have to guess if he did this story when he was drunk or when he was a kid. So...I'd like to share a few of my stories with you, my beloved readers and see if you can determine whether I was Drunk? Or a Kid? Here goes nothing:

Abbrevs are Totes the Best Evs

Ok, for anyone who knows me in a non-professional setting, you know that I'm a big fan of abbreviations in every-day conversation. I can remember back in high school when I found it extremely annoying that everyone and their mother came up with shortened versions of their names. So instead of Lindsey it was Linds. Instead of Jackie it was Jax. and on, and on. And I was probably PO'ed because my name was one syllable and therefore couldn't be shortened but, whatevs. Now, I have an appreesh for the abbrevs. Because people STILL continuously speak in this language and they are being 100 percent serious when they do it. And I have an extremely strong urge to make fun of these people in order to cover up any insecurities I might have about myself. Because they sound absolutely ridiculous. AND because that's what comedians do, right? They make fun of people and things to deflect any negative light that might fall upon them in order to feel better about themselves. (Zack Morris Time Out!!!!

Watch This! Wednesday - Glee Edition

Hey Kids,

Sorry I've been MIA this week. I don't really have a good excuse except that I'm lazy and didn't have much good material to blog about (read: I was hungover and couldn't think straight most of Monday, thanks to Sunday Funday and Theresa's birthday on Saturday, whatup!). And the evenings have been filled with frolicking around the office and yummy places like Goldfish. I also got to dabble in a little Yacht Rock (much to my surprise) last night and despite what most people believe, I do have some semblance of a life so I don't spend all of my time on this blog. But, have no fear because Watch This! Wednesday is here!

Everyone has a Superficial Side...

Here's mine.

So Soph and I were g-chatting this afternoon, and ya know what really gets under my skin? Well, several things actually but specifically: when people are perpetually late. And it's not just late to meet me or one or two people (although that irks me too), I'm talking hold-up-the-whole-group-and-have-some-lame-excuse-as-to-why-you're-late people. I mean, with a large group of people, it's inevitable that one or two people will be running a little behind, but when someone is 30 minutes late and we lose a reservation over it? NOT ok. I typically tell these people to be there at least 20 minutes earlier than the rest of the group just so we all get seated on time. And not once has that person surprised me by being early so kudos to me for thinking ahead.

"Larry David" is my new best friend

Hey kids,

So yesterday afternoon, my boss pulled a Lumberg on me and asked me to come in by 7:45 this morning. Now, for someone who generally gets to the office at 9:00 on the dot, that's kind of asking a bit much of me...but again, he's the one who signs the paychecks so I guess I need to oblige him, right? Riiiight. The reason Dan asked me to come so early today was because he belongs to, what I call, a Secret Society of CEO's. In the real world, it's better known as Vistage, but I like the conotation "Secret Society" brings with it, so I'm gonna go with that.

Watch This! Wednesday

So, I think I want to create a weekly "column" if you will, dedicated to viral videos and dub it "Watch This! Wednesday". I have copious amounts of time on my hands apparently and, as you know, comedy is like breathing for me (and I don't say that to toot my own horn, quite the opposite in fact - it's more like I see the humor in things that are not funny to anyone else, I can't get enough out of comedians, funny shows, blogs, news articles, and shorts). It's a part of my every-day life. It's how I deal with awkward situations and it gets me to 5:00 every afternoon. Soooo, without further ado...I give you the first weekly Watch This! Wednesday!!!!!!!!1

The Punchline

So I'm going to go ahead and apologize for yesterday's post. I'll be real honest with you guys. I have hardly slept in 4 nights until last night. I don't think I went to bed before 3:00am on Thursday, Friday or Saturday night. And Sunday night I wasn't in bed til almost midnight. And I think I was just completely out of it and I hardly remember writing yesterday's entry. And I had probably one of the least productive days at work imaginable. And I have no one to blame but myself for that.

This, on the Day AFTER Jesus Rose from the Dead

Happy Easter Monday everyone!

Ok I can't decide if I'm totally making this up or if this actually happened when I was in school but I feel like we used to have a 4-day weekend every Easter. Does that sound right? We had Good Friday and Easter Monday, right? Because I think that's why everyone would go down to the beach and get plastered on Easter weekend because they would spend that Monday traveling back from Panama City or some other STD-infested city. Is that right? Oh well. I'll just trust that I'm not taking crazy pills and that my high school used to give 4-day weekends (oh you episcopalians!).

April Fools Day

Ugh, I hate this "holiday". And it's not even a real holiday! It's not like I get to take off work so that I can frolick with my friends and play a bunch of jokes on them all day. Nope I have to go to work, just like any other week-day and I don't like it. I'm so eager for tomorrow! I can't wait for 5:00 today! I have had the ever-so-busy morning of catching up on personal emails and facebook and twitter, followed by my daily blog reading and a little bit of "work", also known as "billing" yuck. I technically should have been done with billing yesterday but since I worked for 11 hours straight I didn't quite get around to it. But at 5:00 today, my weekend starts and I couldn't be more thrilled!

Sexting: the good, the bad, the ugly (NSFW)

Sexting...Ok, who's done it before? This topic seems to be coming up in conversation a LOT lately. Well beyond the point of coincidence - and it's a little strange to me. Not the act of sexting (although that's a little strange to me too), but just how many times the topic of sexting has come up in daily life over the last few weeks.

Let me give you, Exhibit A: This weekend I had a movie marathon with Sophia and Consuela (of PCBH fame) and one of the movies we watched was Up in the Air - great movie but super sad, right? However, there was a part about 1/2 way in, where Vera Farmiga and George Clooney start sexting because they're in different cities at the time.

THIS, on the Day that Jesus Died for our Sins...

As I mentioned on Friday, this week MUST be a better week than last week. Last week at work was simply frustrating. I was sore from my half marathon run on Sunday, I came down with a terrible cough/cold that I'm still trying to work out of my system, and I was bogged down at work in a not-so-fun way. But it's a new day - new week for that matter - and I'm determined to make this one better than last week. That being said, it is Monday, which is never fun, but I DO have a 4-day work week, which makes everything that much better. I really should just look at today as a Tuesday - might help me get over the case of the Mondays. Yep, it's Easter week, and for some reason, my small company likes to discriminate and only celebrate Christian holidays so we have Good Friday off. But I can't complain, I LOVE 4-day work weeks and I definitely would be in favor of working 4, 10-hour days and have 3 day weekends all the time if my company allowed it. But alas, they do not.

You know what makes my blood boil?

My boss.

I know that I probably should NOT be blogging about work because of what happened to Meggles a few weeks ago, but this morning was one of the most ridiculous mornings-turned-into-lunch-hours I've ever had here with Dan. You see, Dan is the president of my company. And as the president, you kind of have to respect what he says, does, wants, etc, because at the end of the day, he's the one who signs your paycheck, amiright? But, as I've mentioned before, Dan is somewhat neurotic and a perfectionist - but only in the way that HE sees is perfect, not on a standard level-headed playing field of perfect. So, last week I had a HUGE project that I was working on for one of his clients. The project was a clusterfuck from the beginning - because Dan doesn't understand or take the time to understand how projects on the sister-side of the business work. So he throws everything together last minute, won't let me be the point person on the project because it's HIS client - but he comes up short on every single aspect and expects the rest of our staff to jump through hoops to cover up his blunders and not make him look bad. So the back end of this project has legitimately taken me about 30 hours to put together, between data analysis and reporting. And he doesn't give me any sort of expectation about the reports, he just expects me to "generate some charts from the data". Oh. Ok. Sure. Could you be a little more vague here???? You know, the data is only 52 pages of information from participants. Should be a snap! Right. Why don't you just strike me down RIGHT now because I would rather give myself paper cuts between my  fingers than spend the ungodly amount of time I know I'm going to have to spend on this.

Tyler Herrin

Ok, so I really don't feel like doing much at work today, as a result I've wasted about 2.5 hours on my friend Tyler's Kickstarter, Youtube and Facebook page. He released his album for free download today to all of his "backers" (me!) so I've been enjoying the smooth sounds of Tyler Herrin most of the day. I also updated my "about me" page on my blog so check that out if you feel like it. But this post isn't about me, it's about Tyler. So here goes!

RIP Bella...

Out with the old and in with the new: Say goodbye to Bella/Bells/Bell and say hello to Blaire. I've run a half marathon, shed my caterpillar cocoon and turned into a new and improved version of my former self. Besides simply wanting a new name for myself, I have no other legitimate reason really to change it. But hey, I changed my hair up a little bit last week, I ran off a full average female's calorie intake in two hours on Sunday, so why not change my name too, right? Also - as Blaire, I plan to slightly re-invent myself and take a good hard look at those resolutions I made back in January and TRULY stick with them now. I've done an OK job with it thus far, but spring is in the air, which means summer is soon to follow, and I have yet to achieve the rock-hard body I yearn for, and yet to get out of any ONE of my 3 major debts I'm facing this year. I've chipped away, little by little, but really need to focus on knocking these out in the next few months. I will have ONE debt paid for sure by May (hooray!) and the other two are going to continue to take some time.

Nobody likes a Mr. Sniffles (or a Ms. Sniffles for that matter)

Well, i did it! I ran 13.1 miles on Sunday in the cold wet rain! And all in all, I'd say it was a pretty epic experience. I definitely surprised myself to find that I beat my own expectations by over 15 minutes. That's right, I ran the race in UNDER 2 hours! 1:57:11 to be exact. And I definitely patted myself on the back for that. It was invigorating and exciting, but i am so f-ing sore now. After the race, i could tell I was going to hate my muscles for a couple days but this is excruciating. On top of which, I woke up at 3:30am Monday morning unable to breathe except to cough up a lung. So that was sexy.

t minus 2 days...

and I'm running the half marathon. Holy Skittles I'm a little nervous. But I know I shouldn't be, I trained for almost 3 months - "I can do this if I set my mind to it! High school was a pain in the ass but I graduated" (name that movie...no? nothin? Billy Madison of course, then Billy's dad proceeds to tell him "you graduated because I paid your teachers to give you decent grades!) wamp wamp, I hope Mr. Madison didn't have anything to do with my training - like manipulating the treadmills to make me think I'm running 6 miles when in fact it's only 2. THAT would be a nightmare...AANNNYYWAY...

i feel like death run-over

ugh. why do i do this to myself? why do i allow myself to drink on thursday nights...at all? it never ends well. i feel like someone stabbed a fork into both of my eyeballs and twisted them around like spaghetti.

this is not going to be a good post. i'm also not capitalizing anything. on purpose. the shift key takes too much effort. as does completing coherent thoughts right now. so yeah. jerry is one of my allt-time fave bartenders, but i kind of hate him right now. for the shots. and there's plenty more where that came from. i'm not trying to insinuate anything there. i simply am typing the first thing that comes to my mind that translates to my fingers. right. ok.

And the Twilight Saga Obsession Continues...

Well, it's here. The first full-length trailer of Eclipse debuted today. Yep, the third installment of the Twilight Saga has been made into a movie and is coming to a theatre near you in exactly 112 days! I. Cannot. Wait!

Yesterday, Theresa sent me this 10 second teaser and I was ecstatic! And today she sent me the Full Blown Aids version and I about peed my pants! Ok, that was a lot of back-linking on my part, but for those of you just joining the blog, I figure you need to know what and who I'm talking about. If you're a new reader, you may not be aware of my fasciniation with the Twilight Saga. And before you laugh at me and judge me for being a 24 year old who is fixated on a tween book-obsession, hear me out. I was very hesitant to give Twilight a shot at first.

Read-worthy Blogging

Or is it Blog-worthy Reading? I don't know. All I do know is that I've stumbled upon 2 more entertaining blogs over the last couple of days and I'd like to share them with you. You can check out my blog feed on the right column here -->

OR, you can look specifically here and here so that you know exactly which ones are new additions to my blog list. The first one - Sleep Talking Man - I came across thanks to 2b1b blogger Chris's entry today - one of his commenters left it for us to enjoy and it's kind of amazing. This woman has even included audio clips of her husband saying these crazy things in his sleep! I mean, I could listen to this shit for hours. But I better not since I'm kind of slammed at work today (notice the procrastination action that IS me, writing this entry today).

Blast from the Past - Holy Awkward

So this past Saturday was an interesting one. I went to Leon's in Decatur for happy hour with my girlfriends, and then headed over to my friend's house for a birthday party. Party was a lot of fun and it was good to see everyone - and eventually (as is the routine), the whole group went out to the bars in Buckhead. Stout was the pub of choice and I was having me a good ole time (as per usual). The drinks were flowing and I was feelin pretty good. So I step outside to make a phone call and all of a sudden, I hear a male voice call my name. I turn around and my jaw DROPS.

Holy Skittles! Meg Got Fired!

So this afternoon I was twittering around and I noticed this Tweet from my favorite blogger:
"to clarify: no i'm not joking; i think they're going to sue me for defamation, i guess? and i love you guys too!"

So naturally, I had to click on 2b1b's twitter page and see what was up...and turns out Meggles got FIRED!!! for BLOGGING!!! Holy Seanvote!!!! People can actually get FIRED for BLOGGING??? I mean whoa. That is intense. Makes me a wee-bit nervous about what I write in here now. Granted, I know I haven't been graced with "Boss#1's presence" nor have I ever had the luxury of the most awkward stories in the world, but I have alluded to my boss on occasion.

Bear Hugs: Not All They're Cracked Up To Be

(Editor's note: this may or may not offend cat lovers - don't take it personally please. Second Editor's note: yes I changed my blog template - the pink was becoming nauseating, as I'm sure some of you can agree to)

So last night had all the ingredients to make it a great night. I was planning to work out while Andy went to a networking event, then shower and go over to his place for a movie night. There are LOTS of great movies that Andy hasn't seen - and me being a movie buff thought it only appropriate that I share some of my faves with him. So 8:45 rolls around and I head over to his place - and we had talked about getting a late dinner since we were both preoccupied earlier that evening. So we go and grab some yummy mexican from El Torrero (delish!) and head back to his place. The nachos were to die for and I was quite content during dinner.

"Error PC Load Letter"? What the F*uck Does That Mean?

I hate our color printer. With every fiber of my being. First of all, this is 2010...it should not take 5 whole minutes for the printer to "Warm Up". Especially when it was being used less than 5 minutes earlier. Or if I'm printing 3 different PDF documents but I hit the print button within 10 seconds of the last time. Yet I have to sit. and wait. and wait some more. ugh! I feel like I'm stuck in Office Space.

Wild Bills Recap - A Little Disappointing, Eric Church Recap - Legendary!

Well, I'm sad to say that Saturday night was not the red-neck, buck-toothed experience I thought it was going to be. I was expecting full-on cut-off flanel shirts, paired with gianormous belt buckles, cowboy hats and boots, but I really didn't see that much of that attire there. There were no coyote-ugly bartenders, no mechanical bull (or at least it was out of my line of sight), no line-dancing even! I did see some Woo Girls though, and I, myself became a Woo Girl, so I had that going for me. But all in all, my drinking game didn't play out quite as well as I thought it would have. But the concert was, in a word, AMAZING. There was lots of Jager, TONS of people, and Eric played my song, and we danced and sang and all was right with the world. I got a little, shall we say, schwasty-faced on Saturday, thanks to my very non-coyote-esque (read: she-male) bartender and my good friend Jager:

Drinking Game Saturday - early edition

So as you all know, I'm pretty pumped about the Eric Church concert tomorrow night. And as a result, I've put together a little Drinking Game for Saturday, but I'm posting it today because I know I will not feel like blogging tomorrow. One thing that I'm apparently going to discover on Saturday night, is just how red-neck this place called Wild Bill's is. I've heard stories. And I've been to Cowboy's in Kennesaw, as well as Blindhorse in Greenville - so I think I'm pretty well acquainted with Country Bars and the type of people that frequent them. You've got your under-agers who think they're getting away with passing for 21, but you can tell they're probably only 18 based on the way they're dressed/lack of clothing. There's always a mechanical bull. A huge dance floor that's filled with line-dancing. Sometimes these bars turn into Coyote Ugly for a song or two, just to get the crowd (read: guys in hopes of getting laid) riled up. All in all, I just know it's going to be a classy place. So I'm just going to take a gander about they types of things and people I'll see when I grace Wild Bill's with my presence. So, without further adieu, I give you:

The Eric Church Wild Bill's Drinking Game!

Love of my life - music edition

In 2 days I'll be seeing the most recent love of my music life on stage! I. Cannot. Wait! Eric Church and I are new lovers - it was only last September that we met. (disclaimer, i am a 90s teeny-bopper at heart and Brian Littrell will always be the #1 love of my music life - Eric doesn't quite compare, but for this chapter of my life - and for the subject of this post, he's pure gold) He came to see me at my old college town, Athens, Georgia. It was love at first chord. Now before the night that the actual in-person magic happened, we had started to become acquainted with one another a few weeks prior to our face-to-face. I would ask him questions about where my life was headed, why I was feeling miserable there for a little while, and how did he feel about me. And yes, he answered me in song. It was like he knew exactly the words to say and how to say them.

Must...keep...eyes...open...

That area on my head behind my ears really hurts right now. And for that matter, so does my whole head. And my legs, arms, shoulders, ass and feet. Partially because of working out (effing WOMPs), partially because of dancing in high-heeled boots last night, and partially because I am utterly wiped out. For some reason I agreed to go with Andy to Star Bar last night at 11:30pm! Probably not the smartest thing to do when I have to work in the morning. But hey, it was Mardi Gras last night - that's a viable excuse to go out on a Tuesday, right? Right. Except I forgot it was Mardi Gras until I saw a bunch of people with beads on in the bar.

Did you know that 1 in 3 women suffer from LBL? No I didn't, nor do I care

Disclaimer: the subject of this blog entry is not necessarily something you want to read before lunchtime.

LBL - what the hell is LBL you ask? Well according to 1in3likeme.com it's something that 1 in 3 women suffer from! Head em up, move em out Herpes and HPV, there's a new serious issue that's affecting women these days and it's called LBL (Light Bladder Leakage), and boy has it been a serious problem for women for ages now! According to the website videos, women like Cleopatra, the Mona Lisa, and even EVE (of Old Testament fame, not the R&B artist) have suffered from this horrible problem over the years. Specifically, LBL is just what you think it is - when a women (1 out of 3, mind you), has issues controlling her bladder for a moment.

Atlanta's second annual snowstorm 2K10!

So last night I ran into an old buddy from high school and we got to the whole "what are you up to these days" conversation. I gave him the skinny on my awesome job and that I work in Johns Creek/Duluth area. Now, unless you've been living under a rock this week, you are probably well aware that the entire Atlantic Coast (apart from Georgia and Florida) has had record-breaking snow-falls. My favorite blogger from DC has been talking about it and I've got several friends who have told me that they haven't been at work all week because of the snow. Hell, PCBH's family has had something like 30 inches! and they're in Boone! So last night Johnny Football Star tells me that I better be careful since I work all the way in Johns Creek, I might not be able to get home after about 1:00 today. What? Seriously, I heard Atlanta's only getting 1 inch of snow, maybe, I should be fine! But JFS tells me that we might get as much as FOUR inches. Ho-Ly-Shit. I'm terrified that I'm going to be snowed in at my office all weekend. How much would that suck!

Love/Hate Relationship with my Life Right Now

Overall I'd say that the last few days have been pretty great. Filled with fun, work hasn't been stressing me out too much and I drank like a fish this weekend without feeling too much of the wrath of a hangover on Saturday or Sunday. But on my drive to work this morning I felt a little bi-polar (that's not really the word I'm going with but just go with it) because I was generally not too thrilled about waking up this morning but then I had a few things go just right during my morning commute so it got me to thinking about what I'm loving right now and what I'm hating. So, here goes:

boy do i need a drink

Just a fair warning, this is going to be a complaint-filled entry. If you don't want to hear my complain, I suggest you stop reading and get back to work. Athankyouverymuch.

Blokay - so you wanna keep reading? Here it is, don't say I didn't warn you:

So it's friday afternoon. At 3:17pm. I am hungover. And tired. And cranky. And sore from working out. And did I mention I'm hungover? Yep I partied a little too hard on Thirsty Thursday and I am paying for it dearly today at work. Woke up at 8:15 when I'm supposed to leave my apartment by 8:00 to get to work on time. So that's special. Needless to say there was no time for showering this morning. Just enough time to brush my teeth and wash my face and run a comb through my hair. Just barely.

My Happy Place...

This has been a fabulous morning, a fabulous lunch and I can only imagine it will be followed by a fabulous afternoon. I don't think anything can bring me down!

Let me enlighten you as to why I'm in such a cheery mood compared to last Thursday. I have been working at my job for almost 3 years. And for almost 3 years I've had to suffer through just mediocre breakfast options on my way to work. Sure Panera is not bad, we have an IHOP across the street (which I have yet to visit) and there are even a few chick-fil-a's peppered up my 18 mile commute to the Johns Creek area, but nothing has quite satisfied my pallate over my almost 3 year reign at this company. But yesterday I stumbled upon an amazing discovery via google maps.

apparently i suffer from rage blackouts

I was a little bit hyped up last week. I'm sorry. All was not sunny in my world and I took it out on you guys through my blog and I shouldn't have reacted that way. I apologize if you didn't find any light-hearted banter in my dark and uncomfortable post last week. I was a little upset but I've since treated myself to alcohol on Friday, followed by a hangover remedy on Saturday and a 90 minute run outside on Sunday (in keeping up w/ my half marathon training).

A NOT so Sunny morning in GA...

Oh. My. Gosh. I hate the Johns Creek police. I mean, I hate all police but especially the JCPD. Let me tell you a little something about the JCPD, the courthouse is located on the second floor of my office building. They're our "neighbors" if you will. My company has been the primary leaser on this building for many many years (we're talking 15-20+) and just within the last 2 years, as our company has gotten a little smaller, our landlord has decided to rent out the top floor of our building to a new tenant. The JCPD. Why? you ask. Well, the City of Johns Creek didn't used to be a city - it's a new incorporated city over the last 2 years and whadaya know, they need to create a police department that will be separate from Duluth, Lawrenceville and Sewanee. Because ya know, those three cities simply couldn't cover this unincorporated area. And heaven forbid the Gwinnett county and Fulton County police have to do their jobs too! I mean, this is exactly what this little area of suburbia needs, more cops. Because you know, Johns Creek is such a crime-ridden city, what with their country clubs and uppity neighborhoods. You know, we have GOT to do something about this whole "rolling through stop signs" business - it's simply out of control.

it's been a minute or two since I've last posted

I know you all must be dying without an update on my life in the last week - sorry I've been so slack but work and working out have been quite the beeyatch over the last several days, leaving next to NO time for blogging. And perhaps I did have SOME time over the weekend to blog but, to be honest I have a method to my madness when it comes to not blogging at home. 1) I still have no router in my new apartment and only one of my roommates can get internet on her computer. I feel weird about blogging on a computer that's not mine, something just feels wrong about that. 2) I don't like to spend my time trying to think of fun stories to entertain you on the weekends, I'd rather be living those stories on the weekend so that I can blog about them during the week to avoid actual work.

I'm really doing it...

So over the last week I've come to find out via facebook (aka what I spend most of my time on) that I actually have a LOT of friends coming out of the woodworks who are running the ING half marathon (or the full marathon - kill me)! It's kind of exciting! And now that I've publicly stated it on my blog and on facebook, I can't not do it. I've just been struggling with the whole paying $80 thing. I know, I know, I could be using that $80 to help me get solvent by the end of this year but the way I look at it, this half marathon is a lifestyle change for me. Since I'm running on Saturdays and Sundays, I won't want to go out and get D-runk the night before because I know if I do then I won't be motivated to run the next day. And if I'm not going out as much then the money I would be spending out is actually not being spent and therefore, can go towards my $80 registration fee for the half-marathon! What's that you say? I'm a genius? Well, you said it :)

So I really want to run a half marathon but...

1) It's too damn cold to run outside, and
2) Every time I go to the gym the machines are taken.

FML.

So, I can't take full credit for writing about this topic today. I gotta give some love to my favorite blogger, 2 birds 1 blog. Meggles wrote about this a little bit yesterday (look for the part about ruffling her feathers and enjoy, she's hilarious).

He's just not that into you

Story of my life. And apparently every one of my single friends' lives as well. My roommie and I watched this gem of a movie on Sunday and at the end of it I was highly depressed. I alleviated my depression by watching parts of The Uninvited on HBO...holy shit. At least it took my mind off the terribly depressing feelings I was having before and replaced them with terror and a sudden urge to pee my pants. Don't worry, I controlled myself in case any of you were wondering. But for the last 2 days, I can't help but replay parts of that damn movie ("He's just not that into you") over again in my head. You see, I do this from time to time.

That might be the most depressing letter I've ever read

So, I read the letter. I felt a little bit Ryan Atwood-esque circa 2004 in the OC when he steals a letter out of Marissa's locker, written by Oliver Trast, thinking that it's a love letter to Marissa...only to find out later that Oliver wrote it to his figment of Oliver's chemical imbalance,  imagination, girlfriend, Natalie Bishop. Only, I didn't read this letter out of jealousy, I read it out of pure curiousity. I was curious as to why someone is addressing me as "Bella McGinn" instead of "Bella McBlogger", and I was curious as to who could honestly remember me from my run-in-with-the-law that they would be sending me a letter from jail? Not because I'm not a memorable person. But because I literally did as little amount of talking as possible while I was there and because I was afraid to make eye contact with anyone. I'm still having nightmares about that place and the coke-whorish stories I heard while I was there.

New Year's Resolutions...

Well, here we are, 2010. Holy mother of God. I cannot believe that a decade ago I was ringing in the millenium with my youth group at some big youth festival at the Georgia World Congress Center, worried that we were going to run out of clean water and that our computers were all going to crash and the world as we know it might end. My how things have changed. This time of year always gets me thinking about how the previous year played out and what things I should strive to do differently/better. And I figured that this blog might serve as a good way to keep me accountable for my resolutions this year. Because there are a lot of things that happened in 2009 that I don't want to repeat in 2010. Lots of lifestyle changes to be made. I don't want to be a sour sally or a negative nancy and say that I know I'm not going to keep all of these resolutions before I've even started them. I truly want to try! And, one thing I've found, when I did a WW blog 2 years ago, is that setting mini goals is the best way to keep a resolution going. So here goes: