Doom's Day is rapidly approaching

So most of you know that I am a 24-year-old, Atlanta native. Yep, 24. Which means the big 2-5 is rapidly approaching. And I'm not happy about it one bit. 25! That sounds so old! I guess that when I was younger, I thought that by the time I turned 25 I'd have my life figured out. And that is FAR from the case. I'll be 25 in less than 2 months and aside from having a steady job, I pretty much have NOTHING else figured out. And the steady job is really just exactly that. It's not necessarily what I want to settle into and do for the rest of my life (i'm still figuring that out) but it's a time-killer and a money-maker for the time being. Keeps food on the table and a roof over my head...and allows me to lead an extravagant lifestyle fork over the rest to the state, much to my chagrin.

And let's just review the fact that in 2 years I went to 9 weddings. Granted, I was someone's date to a few of those but still, NINE in TWO years? Apparently a lot of my friends have their shit figured out already. They've found the man or woman of their dreams and started a family. Well smack me sideways if THAT'S where I'm supposed to be in my life...I am FAR from that, as I've pointed out several times before. 25?? Really? Ugh, that makes me want to rub my face on a cheese grater. I remember, not so long ago, picking on my ex about when he turned 25. I was a mere 23 years old at the time...and now here I sit, 2 months away from the decrepit age of 25. Ugh. It makes me sick. Shouldn't I be settled into a fabulous job that I love and dating Mr. Right and thinking about my future and buying a house or something? Or at least a new car? Gah, I can barely think past next week! And let's just say I'm not quite where I want to be financially, thanks to Johnny Law and unexpected car repairs. But dammit, I feel like I should have at least ONE aspect of my life figured out by now.

I watched Post Grad this weekend - cute movie with Rory from the Gilmore Girls - and it's talking about how her life -- post-graduation -- has NOT turned out like she thought it would. In fact, everything that she had planned for herself turned out completely wrong. She didn't get the job she dreamed of, she dated someone WAY older than her that wasn't going anywhere, she had horrible car repairs the day after she graduates college, she was living at home -- the list goes on...and that's totally relatable! Because Lord knows that I moved home after college, totaled my car about a year later, have dated a couple men who were all wrong for me, and while I did get a decent job, it's not what I really imagine myself doing forever. The movie, of course, ends with her falling in love with her best friend, the guy who's always been there since day 1, who she saw as strictly platonic. She realizes that no matter what kinds of things happen to you in life, if you're not there to share it with the right people, none of it's worth it. So it's a very "love conquers all" type of movie, which makes me feel all gushy inside but at the same time kind of wants to make me yarf a little. Because on top of not having my career and finances figured out, I also feel very behind in the "relationship" department. And that's not to say I'm not dating and putting myself out there - I am just nowhere near the point in my life where I can even IMAGINE being married. I like to have my space and my personal ME time and my independence. But marriage obviously changes that dynamic of a person's life. Everything you do is now a "we do". Which again, makes me want to yarf.

I guess what I'm saying is, why the rush? I mean I get it, we're 25 (not yet!), we're getting old, whatever...but seriously? Are you ready to become a "we" so early in your life? I'd like for someone to let me in on the secret to getting your shit together and settling down. And then I can decide whether I want to grow up or not. I know that my parents aren't thrilled with all of my life choices thus far but I simply can't wrap my head around being a "we" yet. Maybe by the time I'm 30 I'll have figured it out. But how bout we just let me get to the big 2-5 first ::shudder::